Oh Lord help me today I do think I will make it through motherhood let alone being a wife. I have been tired and feeling alone for a week or more now running the kids here and there. I am not sportsman nor a mom that believes in my kids being involved in everything. How do I show the importance of a kid being a kid running and playing in the woods will build so much more knowledge and team building than a little league game where parents are yelling at an 8 year old to "move your lazy but or he will not play again.". This is not how I feel my children should view team work or parenting. I want them to know team work comes from hard work and planning a tree fort and accomplishing the plan with others even if it's just their siblings.
Today it is our at home day the only one all week and my kids chose to watch tv and play mindcraft but at least now they play together and drew out a plan for the world they create. Why then do I hate being here hate just cleaning after everyone over and over each day. It's the same old thing and I want change if you can't tell I am very much an extrovert but everything biblical says I am to cook and clean but I am not ok with that I want more. What am I to do to make sure I don't go crazy in this thing called biblical woman hood? I listen to sermons and read my bible but all I get is guilt. This is why it has been months since I have posted here.
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