To the 12 year old me!

Dear 12 year old Aliza
     Today is short so enjoy it. Not everything is easy in life but know you are safe you are loved and you will make it through middle school. You are going to have some of the hardest days of your life in middle school most of your classmates will not have a clue what you are going through let alone your teachers.
    One day you will want to do nothing more than read a good novel, yes I said novel, I know that three pages in life science seems like it takes all day. Todays struggled will look so simple, not because life is hard, but because you persevered. Many people will tell you, you can't but you can and you will.
    Spend time with the people that are close, it will not be guaranteed that they will be here tomorrow. I don't want to share to much I just want you to know that you need to enjoy Mandy's laugh. Record grandma and grandpas stories, they will not be able to share all of them with your kids.
    Don't waist your time with the girls that think they are better than you because God has a great plan for you that is down a long hard road. In the end what happens at school means very little in your life. The only thing you can do is be kind to others each day, it is their choice to do as they wish and you are stronger than they will know.  You will learn a lot from your relationship in high school but don't let them take you away from missing out on what you believe is right for you to keep you mind and body healthy.
     Trust only those that truly believe in you and don't let anyone say you can't accomplish your dream to share the love of Christ with others. You will have a great way of Sharing even if you don't learn Hebrew or Greek. There are false witness out there be aware of how satin uses them even when you are young.
     Best of all love life even though it gets hard. In 20 years you will be married for 13 years and have 3 amazing kids. God has provided in ways you never imagined. Its not easy but you are loved and safe. 

With all my love,
 The 32year old  you

Protection

Adam and Eve!! Wow the true picture of marriage.  Well we as wives are supposed to be helpers we try to take over the world.  In the process I think our culture has lost what God intended us to be. Adam was to be the protector of Eve but even in the beginning he let her persuaded him to the wrong thing.  Sometimes I feel like we wives are like this but I also look back and think  that my husband was supposed to stand up and protect us from this or that. On the other hand when I need him to protect me and make sure I am safe he is not there. Did I miss the mark completely?
    My husband spends anywhere from 7 to 12 weeks away from home a year. Some of you think that's no big deal. You are a single mom or a military wife or something along those lines with 90%of the year home without a spouse there. To you I say WOW I know I could do any of that. On the other hand I have friends that complain if their spouse is 20mins late once a month.  Why is it as women that we are wired most of us to have our spouse there with us?
  God is our protection right? But did he not make marriage in the image of himself and the church? He the bride groom and us the church the bride? How would the church function if we pulled God out 4weeks a year or more? Not well that is not how we are ment to be. I think that along the way the meaning and function of the roles have gone amiss.  I really am not that up on this at this time and should have done more research but if I am wrong on the biblical views of husband and wife as it was written I challenge you to correct me this means looking back at the text of the bible king James version or another traditional version to see.
  I challenge the men to lead with protection and love as the number one matter in marriage because then the wife is going to follow with respect and honor.  God is the head of the church but he also is the loving protection for her. I never see where he beats her physically or emotionally, I don't see how he turns his back on her when he sacrificed his son to save her. I do however see how he brought her back out of sin with love when Jesus went to the woman at the well. When he provides for Job when he had given up everything.  And many more.places so that brings me to the next thing on my mind.
     Are you willing to give up everything including your pride for what is right?  I had to give up a job I loved this past month to make a stand for what I believed was right it was not easy and still I play in my mind if I would have stayed it may have been better and even with my leaving for what I hope would open the eyes of some people may not have been noticed as that being the reason.  I feel that I took a hit to my pride as some have told me to just deal with it and others have agreed that hopefully eyes will be opened.  When you put two weeks in at a job you love it does take a hit to your pride but when we do it for the ones closest to us because the effects of the job are so hard on you and you bring it home you realize that it was only selfish pride anyway.
  So why do we so often chose pride over protection?  I think because very few notice the effects of protection. The protection comes most of the time with a smaller pay check. The jobs that keep us busy away from family and are more stress often get more money and our culture has put the price tag on the things that make us feel proud in front of our friends. Because no longer is there pride in a marriage it's replaceable in less than a few months.  It seems even our children's behavior is something we take pride in any more. I caught myself the other day responding to a wonderful complaint about my daughter with "You didn't see her at home last night" Really my kids are great for what they deal with from me.
  This week try to remember that protection for our families is much more than a roof over their heads it is the protection of the heart issues are they feeling loved safe and cared for.

Lord I lift these readers and their homes up to you right now that you will bless them and help them to remember that first and for most we are to protect ourselves and those around us from the temptations of saint. We ask your guidance and love as we know the closer we follow the harder he tries to distract us from you true protection.
In Jesus name Aman